There are some horrible noises out there. Far away, not my problem. Please stay farawaynotmyproblem. Is it getting closer? Stupid noises.
Raccoons again? They make weird noises. Maybe they’re mating?
No, I think maybe dogs are fighting. That sounds awful, and it’s getting closer. Ugghhh I am a bad person if I don’t pull these dogs off one another. One sounds really hurt. DAMNIT I will never be ready for class tomorrow.
I open the door, flip on the light, see some cyclists, look for the injured dog. There isn’t an injured dog. These kids are riding down the street making loud whimpering sounds. When they saw me, they went into high-pitched shrieking-whimpering, like a bunch of effing banshees.
Of all the weird stuff I’ve seen in Eugene, this one actually strikes me as strangest. Undergrads, GET OFF MY LAWN!